A Letter to My Younger Self

A Letter to My Younger Self

The world is full of fakes and phonies, always stay true to yourself.

You will veer off the path a lot, follow your heart to get back on track.  Don’t let everyone’s opinion dictate who you are.

You will forget who you are when society tries to take control, find happiness in the simple things.

Stay true to your values and your heart, don’t change either for romance or a job.

Everyone makes bad decisions sometimes, don’t let those decisions ruin your impression of their true self.

Your life will be full of heartache and blindness, don’t get down on yourself.

Always, always trust your gut because it will steer you in the right direction.

Take every hardship as an opportunity to grow and learn or you will be overwhelmed with anxiety and negativity.

Friendships should always be valued, because duration of friendship means nothing when someone has no character.

You will have breakdowns throughout your life, but make sure you pick up your pieces and brush it off.

Never apologize for being yourself, because being you is the most authentic thing you can be.

Don’t let a job title lead you to treat people differently. Always lead with kindness and treat everyone as a human.

There are no milestones you need to hit at any specific age. Do what makes you smile at any age you want because age is just a number, don’t ever settle.

Don’t let the nosy people around you make you feel down with their questions, use this as a chance to teach others and help them understand life’s experiences.

Don’t let the pushback of your ideas stop you.  You know what feels right, keep going.

Ask others for help, you can’t do everything on your own. Face the fear of asking for help.

Kindness and love feel better than any amount of money.

Embarrassment is a part of life, don’t let it keep you silent.

You are not weak because you love and support someone that is changing their life for the better.

Confidence and loyalty are the sexiest traits.

Don’t think because something is popular that it is right. It is the path less traveled that makes the biggest difference.

Never be ashamed of your story because through it your authenticity shows.

Be thankful for your family and their love, they helped you become who you are.

People will come and go in life, sometimes suddenly and sometimes by choice.  Don’t chase them, just learn from the time you had with them.

Never feel guilty about doing things for yourself, if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of others.

Cheer for one another, instead of judging each other.

Always keep it real, but allow yourself to make mistakes. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

Be your own biggest cheerleader so others can cheer with you.

Be a great role model for younger generations and your children so that they lead with kindness and love.

Love anyone you want, but make sure they are good to you and good for you.

Featured in Cosmo!

Featured in Cosmo!

Check it out! I was featured in the Cosmopolitan article “What IVF Really Feels Like, According to 12 Women Who Did It.” The article includes perspectives from 11 other amazing women that shared their experience with IVF. Unfortunately, IVF is still a taboo and not enough women know or talk about it. Thank you so much Cosmopolitan for publishing this article and creating additional awareness!


Unspoken Truth- My IVF Journey

Unspoken Truth- My IVF Journey

“I am thankful for my struggle, because without it I wouldn’t have stumbled across my strength”

A while back my step dad shared an article from the newspaper with me. The article was about the death of Dr. Howard Jones at the age of 104. This doctor had opened the first In vitro Fertilization Clinic. For some reason I could not stop thinking about how much I owe this family. This amazing man and his wife began the first IVF clinic and the first baby was born through In vitro fertilization through their clinic. Without this man and his intelligence I would not have the growing family I have today.

In December 2011, I was diagnosed with Endometriosis and blocked Fallopian tubes. The way I had stumbled across this was I had started the invasive infertility tests. When I stopped my birth control I was not getting my period at all and kept thinking I was pregnant. That was completely incorrect and they told me they are not sure so I need to go to a fertility specialist. When they found the Fallopian tubes blocked it was during the HSG test. I will never forget this test. It was dye injected into the uterine cavity through the vagina and cervix. The reason the test hurt for me is because my Fallopian tubes were blocked. The dye should have spilled into my abdomen but it did not. The words I will never forget from the insensitive doctor I had never met was “this is why you will never get pregnant.” I cried the whole way home in the car with my husband. He had no idea what to say and I think felt the same emptiness I felt.

The emptiness I felt came from the feeling I had my whole life about raising a family one day. I thought it had been taken away from me in one 15 minute test. I remember the feeling I had when I held my nephew for the first time. I could imagine being a mother one day. I was the youngest of 4 kids so I was 10 when my nephew was born and I loved the idea of this little baby growing up right in front of me!

So my husband and I discussed a few options before I had my surgery. After my surgery, where they removed both Fallopian tubes and I lost the ability to conceive a baby naturally, I wanted to start the IVF process. My fertility doctor sat with me and informed me that my chances were high to get pregnant through IVF. He said he is not sure the amount of tries or how much it would cost but we should get started. I trusted my IVF doctor, although he was unable to prepare me for the emotional roller coaster and financial drain, I was ready to try. My husband was behind me no matter what my decision was and supported me through this intrusive process.

I am writing this story because I have never felt such a connection to the couples or women/men that hope for a child of their own or to grow their family. Even if you never want to have children you can relate to this longing for something you are told you can’t have. We need to be more empowering to one another and cheer each other on. Because with our differences and similarities we are all struggling to make our lives our own and feel good about it.

As I write this, I have two beautiful children running around playing with dinosaurs and singing along to the tv. All of this happened with 1 failed IVF cycle and 2 successful IVF cycles. I sit back and I am grateful to a couple that I have never met because without their intelligence and motivation this experience would not have been able to happen.

Dr. Howard Jones thank you for being a pioneer and an extraordinary doctor. I can only hope my generation can make a huge difference in medicine and help others like you did. Making a difference in people’s lives is one of the most rewarding experiences. I can honestly say this stranger has made a huge impact on my life. I believe everyone deserves happiness and to live life to the fullest.

Look out for my first podcast discussing the IVF journey further.

“The secret to having it all is knowing you already do”