“The course of true love never did run smooth” – William Shakespeare

I am a woman who fell for the “find someone and your whole life changes” kind of life.  Now the movies and books weren’t completely wrong but they did hype it up and put all of my happiness in someone else’s hands. What I came to find out is I held that key to happiness the whole time.  By reacting differently, being grateful, and not comparing myself to others is when I found true happiness.  Media makes love at first sight literally staring at someone and falling madly in love.  I don’t think that ever happens, I mean you definitely look at someone and feel a connection, but to look at someone and absolutely forget everything about life and see this person as better than yourself is kind of absurd.  I now look in the mirror and get that love at first sight kind of love.  I look in the mirror and see real, authentic truth pouring out of my heart and I am absolutely in love with my reflection.  Do not get me wrong, I do love my husband and I love who he is and has become but I have learned that loving myself first is the key to any successful relationship I will have in my life. It takes a ton of work and time to make relationships feel right.  Just like everything in life, things change and people grow and you need to be ready for all of that.  God will help lead the way but your effort has to be there and you should find that love for yourself first.  I think one of my greatest challenges in life is my marriage but I am wholeheartedly invested in a great story and giving people hope.

The truth is, you will outgrow your old self and you need to be ready to step into your new role.  The person you fell in love with at a younger age is still there but growing with that person is the best and scariest experience you will have.  I was in love with my young, playful, sweet, fat and lovable self as a child.  Then I lost myself for awhile in high school and college but I accepted that time as an experience of finding myself and although I still loved myself, I didn’t love myself first.  And now I adore the mom, professional, wife, sister, and daughter that I have become. I am overcoming challenges and obstacles I never thought would be a part of my life but I adore it.  I let myself feel pain and then I allow myself to forgive and move on. It is this cycle that some call vicious but I think if we call it the workable cycle of life than we may feel a bit more positive about it. Without love we don’t know ourselves and without relationships we really don’t know love.  So, remember that your thoughts and your hard work can lead you any direction, and although you will get off track, just remember to love yourself first!